When a gay cannibal comes of age,
A quaint passage rite sets the stage
With an all-you-can-eat
Buffet of man-meat,
After which he’s a full homophage.
A homophage is any organism that consumes a human in whole or part. Well, in French, anyway. Actually, the proper word in English is probably closer to “anthropophagist,” but that kills the “homo” joke. Let’s pretend it’s correct. “10 Engrossing Facts About Cannibalism” describes how for the better part of a million years, cannibalism has been integral to the survival story of our species. After all, an adult victim on average supplies about 66 lbs (30 kg) of fat, organs, muscle and skin in precisely the form best-suited for the human body. Human muscle tissue, sometimes referred to as “long meat,” is said to look like beef, but taste like pork. But don’t crack the head open looking for a snack. A neurologically degenerative disease called kuru, which is similar to mad cow disease, can occur from eating human brains. Oddly, in 2009, scientists identified a gene that provides some Papua New Guinean cannibals immunity to the prions (infectious proteins) that cause the disease. See also Mozambique.