Limericks, Rated G

Wet Nurse Neve

“Since production can’t meet demand,”
Wet Nurse Neve said, “I’ll expand.”
So, she’s leased four more nipples
And when output triples,
She’ll flood the milk market, as planned.

See also this limerick’s companion piece:

According to Fact Retriever and Wikipedia, historically, wet nursing was a profession, in which mainly poor rural women provided breast milk for the children of wealthy urban families. Not surprisingly, conditions among the peasantry weren’t so great, so the quality of care plummeted. This led to high infant mortality rates. Now some interesting facts about breast milk and breastfeeding. For the infant: it is far less likely to die of sudden infant death syndrome, leukemia, diabetes, diarrhea or pneumonia; it is more likely to have a higher IQ, a healthier gut microbiome and decreased risk of asthma, dental problems, eczema or even obesity later in life. For the woman: she reduces her chance of breast or ovarian cancer, experiences less post-partum bleeding, returns to her pre-pregnancy weight more easily, is protected against diabetes and may bond more readily with her baby. The milk itself contains amino acids, enzymes, carbohydrates, lipids, vitamins, minerals, lymphocytes (such as white blood cells in the early milk called colostrum), hormones, over 200 different sugar molecules (including lactose), and a substance called alpha-lactalbumin that is lethal to cancer cells.

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