Limericks, Rated G

Earl the Squirrel

Earl the thrill-seeking squirrel’s
Totally nuts about Tilt-A-Whirls;
So much so, that he spends
Entire weekends
Spinning ’round and ’round ’til he hurls.

There are 285 squirrel species that range from the half-ounce pygmy tree squirrels of western Africa to the nearly 20-pound gray marmots of Kazakhstan. They have four front teeth that continue to grow their whole lives and require constant gnawing to keep them sharp and the optimal length. The Tilt-A-Whirl is a flat ride designed for commercial use at amusement parks, fairs and carnivals. The verb hurl, literally meaning “toss or throw,” is slang for “vomit,” with synonyms such as “throw up,” “toss [cookies],” “upchuck” and “heave.”

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