Massage Parlor
The massage parlor you’re attending
Regards gratuity spending
As not formal or stringent,
But rather contingent
On the merits of one’s happy ending.
A happy ending massage — “sensual massage with all the perks” — starts like any other, with a typical full-body rubdown, but it ends with a handjob. According to the AMTA, massage parlors are a $16 billion business in the United States. Illicit ones account for unknown billions of dollars, perhaps in the $3 billion range, for organized crime. Some 9,000 parlors are said to sex-traffic women. Meanwhile in China, prostitution generates $73 billion and involves some 5 million women. At least one in five massage parlors in China is involved in prostitution. However, having a masseuse “hit your airplane” — a Chinese euphemism for jacking off — hasn’t been illegal since 2013. The Atlantic reported that loopholes in the country’s penal (penile?) code exempted “masturbation services” from sex trade statutes that narrowly defined prostitution as paid intercourse.
