Limericks, Rated G

The Pieru Club

In Finland, no one’s more kinky
Than the Pieru Club of Helsinki;
Whereas Finns for the most part
Don’t fetishize the fart,
These guys leave saunas stinky.

Paraphrased from Baklol and Buzzfeed’s “12 Incredible Facts You Never Knew About Farts”: Farts are 99 percent odorless gases, such as nitrogen, carbon dioxide, hydrogen and methane. The stink comes from just one percent, usually gases like dimethyl sulfide and methanethiol from eggs and meat, which are high in sulfur. Most people average one liter of gas a day from 14 farts. The causes of flatulence are usually hard-to-digest foods like cauliflower, Brussels sprouts, beans, broccoli, cabbage and bran, plus fructose (the sugar in fruits) and dairy products. Farts can reach speeds of 10 feet per second, almost seven miles per hour. A rough guess of all historical human fart output: 17 quadrillion farts. Pieru means “fart” in Finnish.

Discover more from

Subscribe now to keep reading and get access to the full archive.

Continue reading